I recently heard a TV sermon by Joel Osteen, whom I like very much, about dropping people who are harmful to a person's life. He said one should drop people who bring you down, people who add nothing positive to your life, detrimental people who bring nothing but pain to you.
I read that the great writer Herman Hesse never dropped people. Also, I can't imagine Jesus dropping people. If Jesus dropped people who were not up to his level, he would have had to drop everyone alive. I'm sure that Mary Magdalene didn't add much in the way of positive experience to his life, but he didn't drop her. Perhaps, the fact that he didn't drop her is what healed her. I think Jesus should be our ultimate guide.
This was once a major problem in my life, because I had a mentally ill parent (border-line paranoia schizophrenia- 3 times hospitalized), who was quite emotionally cruel to me and never quite up to parenting. I went through periods in my life where I dropped her for a while then got back with her, then dropped her, and reconciled, on and on this way. At the times when I did drop her, I felt it was for the sake of my well-being. However, when I was 22, I had a deep religious experience, an intense rebirth experience, and became God centered. After that happened, she didn't have the power to seriously hurt me anymore, except for my immediate feelings, but the dropping and reconciling still went on and on. This produced guilt on my part, which was the main reason I reconciled with her over and over. I think if one is God centered, you can no longer be seriously hurt by people who are lashing out in anger against you. You can have your feelings hurt, but that goes away. During my Mother's last days (cancer), I was with her, and I'm glad for that. The ironic thing is that when she was dying, she dropped me. That assuaged my guilt quite a lot.
I’ve been dropped a few times by people, who just refused to ever speak to me again even if I was standing right in front of them. This is an extremely painful experience, and I wouldn’t advise doing that to another person, even if you think that person might be Satan in person.
People who are emotionally tied to a very abusive person, I think need help, like the person who is only with a person because they can't stand being alone. Or, the woman who is tied to an abusive person, because they can't earn their own living, or don't want to. These are not God-centered people. A God-centered person can be happy with themselves alone. They don't need to be constantly with another person. You have to drop someone if you become scared of physical violence in the relationship.
I still drop people, but not totally. I'm polite to them when I meet them, and listen to them if they want to tell me something, but I don't share my own life with them, which they aren’t interested in anyway. In other words, I emotionally distance myself from them. That's pretty much what Joel Osteen said to do in his sermon. I've totally dropped Internet acquaintances, but I doubt if that seriously would hurt another person. We don't know what Jesus would have said about that.
I read that the great writer Herman Hesse never dropped people. Also, I can't imagine Jesus dropping people. If Jesus dropped people who were not up to his level, he would have had to drop everyone alive. I'm sure that Mary Magdalene didn't add much in the way of positive experience to his life, but he didn't drop her. Perhaps, the fact that he didn't drop her is what healed her. I think Jesus should be our ultimate guide.
This was once a major problem in my life, because I had a mentally ill parent (border-line paranoia schizophrenia- 3 times hospitalized), who was quite emotionally cruel to me and never quite up to parenting. I went through periods in my life where I dropped her for a while then got back with her, then dropped her, and reconciled, on and on this way. At the times when I did drop her, I felt it was for the sake of my well-being. However, when I was 22, I had a deep religious experience, an intense rebirth experience, and became God centered. After that happened, she didn't have the power to seriously hurt me anymore, except for my immediate feelings, but the dropping and reconciling still went on and on. This produced guilt on my part, which was the main reason I reconciled with her over and over. I think if one is God centered, you can no longer be seriously hurt by people who are lashing out in anger against you. You can have your feelings hurt, but that goes away. During my Mother's last days (cancer), I was with her, and I'm glad for that. The ironic thing is that when she was dying, she dropped me. That assuaged my guilt quite a lot.
I’ve been dropped a few times by people, who just refused to ever speak to me again even if I was standing right in front of them. This is an extremely painful experience, and I wouldn’t advise doing that to another person, even if you think that person might be Satan in person.
People who are emotionally tied to a very abusive person, I think need help, like the person who is only with a person because they can't stand being alone. Or, the woman who is tied to an abusive person, because they can't earn their own living, or don't want to. These are not God-centered people. A God-centered person can be happy with themselves alone. They don't need to be constantly with another person. You have to drop someone if you become scared of physical violence in the relationship.
“Loneliness is the poverty of self; solitude is richness of self.” ― May Sarton
I still drop people, but not totally. I'm polite to them when I meet them, and listen to them if they want to tell me something, but I don't share my own life with them, which they aren’t interested in anyway. In other words, I emotionally distance myself from them. That's pretty much what Joel Osteen said to do in his sermon. I've totally dropped Internet acquaintances, but I doubt if that seriously would hurt another person. We don't know what Jesus would have said about that.
